streaks across my psychedelic sky

Going Solo

Posted on: April 11, 2006

Kill me now and be quick about it. The stress I feel is like the sure road to a slow death.

I should have known the weekend was too good to be true. It was almost perfect, the kind you wish you could always have. But then Monday arrived and everything became undone. Slowly; like knitted sweater being pulled by one single errant thread.

Late January, a friend invited me and two other girl friends to an all expense paid trip to Boracay. It was too good to be true. We each had our doubts but we decided to play it by ear. Good thing, too, because two months later, no text message, no call, no email about the details of the trip. Zilch. Nada. Nein.

No choice but move to Plan B because my mind has been so set to be away from the city for 4-7 days. G learned that co-workers and friends are planning a trip to Bantayan Island, and they said we could tag along. Cool! Only problem is, they will be with friends who I am not familiar with. Normally, I wouldn't mind but a lot of things have happened in the last few weeks that I feel I am not going to be my usual friendly, whatever-happens-is-ok-as-long-as-its-not-grossing-me-out self. So I frantically called a few resorts within the island to see if I can find a place that offered solitude. No such luck. Most places were booked solid.

Except for one of the mountain resorts. Now G is not like me who likes being in the mountains and all that cool weather and trees as much as I like being at the beach or at sea. She loves the beach; she loves the water. We both do. But when it comes to mountains and all places higher than a bump, expect G to smile broadly and wave you on your merry way.

But the solitude and the idea of being up in the mountains, so far away from the city, appealed to me. I am beginning to feel like maybe things happened the way they did because I was meant to fulfill what I had planned late last year – to go on vacation by myself. I think it will do me a lot of good. All the stress, career and personal, is starting to take its toll on me.

So go solo, I shall. I am still rethinking of taking my cam with me. I don't know if there will be much scenery to take pictures of. But then again, I just might regret not bringing it if I miss taking great photos of the sunrise or the sunset. Or maybe moonrise, if I am lucky.

I can't wait to be able to wake up and get out of bed when I want to, not because I have to. I am sure the four days away from all things I am familiar and comfortable with will do me a lot of good.

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