The Day That Was

Posted by: Fay on: April 18, 2006

In: Slivers
4 Comments

I woke up this morning on the right side of happy. I danced myself into my morning norm and was at work early. Not even the half-hour wait for a jeepney that went my route dampened my day. I usually don't have to wait five minutes to catch a ride. The bank called at 10:45am to tell me my checking account had no funds. What-the-friggin'..?? Me?!! No funds? MY Checking Account? Again… What-the…?? Something definitely wrong with that picture. After calmly talking with the lady banker who, by the way, was very reasonable, it was settled. No charges or penalties because it really wasn't my fault. I was never told my SA wasn't linked to my CA. The cash has been sitting in my SA for a month now. The banker had someone come to my office to get the money since I would be in a meeting and couldn't go to the bank to catch up with the clearing cut-off time. All was well again. I couldn't stop feeling like everything was right in my world. Of course, in reality, it isn't. I am worried for someone but wearing a sick look on my face sure won't help matters.

But this feeling was short-lived. The meeting at 11am did it. It was such a boring doozey. All that talk I have heard before. The meeting wasn't for me but I had to be in attendance. Duty-bound, that's what I am, like it or not. By the end of the hour-long meeting, I was starting to have a headache. Gone was my happy tune: the music in my head that I danced to, the one that always brought a smile to my face, a spring to my step, a glow in my eyes. I wasn't sad. No. I was simply back in the void; the single-mindedness of purpose akin to an empty, hollow feeling that pervades, but not quite.

I went home and read a chapter of the book I have not finished yet then took a nap. It was a strange few winks: I was asleep but my mind was basking in the void; alert but not really minding. A freaky kind of weird. I woke up feeling like I just went up and down five hills carrying my weight in bricks. I headed back to the office to brood about it some more. No, really. The office is my escape from the real world. Work absorbs me, makes me empty my mind of other concerns, gives me a few moments of respite before I have to turn around and face reality again.

Currently listening to: breathe in, frou frou
Currently feeling: read the post above
Currently craving: Starbucks' Caramel Blended Cream
Currently reading: my journal
Currently wearing: black cargo jeans, orange tee, black wedge sandals
Currently missing: my brain… it stepped out for air while the heart is closed for repairs